🏕️ Overview
John Diefenbach is the friend who lives a little too far off the grid.
Hidden away in the woods of Clairfield, Tennessee, he spends his days doing handyman jobs, hunting, fishing — and his nights spiraling down conspiracy rabbit holes.
Locals think he’s “strange,” but online?
John thrives in late-night forums, radio groups, and survival communities.
Despite his quirks, he’s loyal, resourceful, and exactly the guy you’d want around if everything ever went sideways.
🌲 Early Life & Background
John was born and raised in Clairfield — a struggling coal mining town where his family scraped by.
His German surname traces back to his grandfather, who immigrated during the coal boom and stayed in Tennessee, passing down stories of survival and deep mistrust of authority.
Growing up isolated, John turned to:
- hunting
- fishing
- tinkering with old radios
By his teens, he was “the weird kid,” obsessed with secret societies and government cover-ups.
Instead of chasing college or city life, he doubled down on living off-grid — building a tiny cabin and surviving on what he could hunt, trade, or repair.
🏡 Where He Lives
John lives in a tiny cabin he built himself in the Tennessee woods.
It’s powered by solar panels, heated by a wood stove, and has no cable TV or city utilities.
Inside, the cabin is filled with:
- old radios
- maps
- survival manuals
- chickens and a garden outside
He rarely leaves the property unless he needs supplies.
🔧 Career & Lifestyle
John does odd handyman jobs around town to make ends meet.
He hunts, fishes, trades, barters, and avoids spending money unless absolutely necessary.
He spends nights scanning radio frequencies “just in case,” convinced he’s picking up secret codes.
He prefers barter over cash every time.
🧠 Personality
John is paranoid… but surprisingly endearing.
He’s wildly resourceful and can fix almost anything using duct tape and wire.
He mistrusts:
- the government
- big corporations
- anything “too convenient”
But he’s fiercely loyal to the few people he trusts, and he finds comfort in routine, nature, and solitude.
🍲 Foods & Drinks
John mostly eats what he hunts or catches:
- venison stew
- fried fish
- canned chili
- cornbread
- whatever’s cheap at Dollar General
He drinks instant coffee by the gallon.
His guilty pleasure: Mountain Dew.
📡 Escape Routine
For John, escape means:
- hunting trips deep in the mountains
- late-night radio scanning
- decoding “messages” he swears are real
- sitting by a fire ranting about “the truth they don’t want you to know”
Living in the woods where no one bothers him is his idea of paradise.
🗣️ Catchphrases
- “That’s exactly what they want you to think.”
- “Do your own research.”
- “I don’t trust it — too many coincidences.”
- “The news is just entertainment, man.”
- “If the grid goes down, I’ll be just fine.”
🎉 Fun Facts
- Refuses to own a smartphone — uses a flip phone
- Claims he saw a UFO once while hunting
- Owns a massive collection of survival guides and conspiracy books
- Family thinks he’s “the strange one” but always calls him when something breaks
- Has dozens of online friends who only know him by username
🤝 How He Met Jeff
Jeff met John by chance while passing through Clairfield, Tennessee.
Stopping for gas, Jeff overheard John talking to the clerk about gas prices and government control.
Curious, Jeff struck up a conversation.
Minutes later, John was sharing theories, and Jeff was cracking jokes right back.
A quick gas stop turned into an hour-long talk about survival, conspiracies, and side hustles.
They stayed in touch, and now whenever Jeff drives through Tennessee, he visits John’s cabin to share beers — Jeff bringing stories from the outside world, John bringing whatever he’s “discovered” off the grid.